It won´t fade

The last class for today was gym, and we had to walk around in the woods with a map. And I suck at reading maps. I couldn´t read a map even if my life depended on it xP
So thank god for Johannah being there :P
And Johannah told me the funniest (true) story ever as we were walking;
Her uncle(I think) commited suicide a few years ago, and he wrote a suicide note, and in the note he explained that he had commited suicide..(Like, DUH, no kidding?)And in the note he also wrote that he wanted to be buried with his favorite shirt: an ugly ass, typical Hawaii-shirt, cause he wanted to "take it with him to heaven"...
And then, at his funeral, no one was crying, they were all laughing at his suicide-note.
It´s a bit tragic, but I laughed my ass off when she told me that. Maybe that was the uncle´s goal; maybe he just wanted to be remembered...

And then we (me, Lisa and Johannah) discussed death, and Lisa asked how we would want to die, and I thought of the most peerfect scene ever:
"I´m in Finland in bed with Amy Lee while getting tattooed by Kat von D while HIM is standing in front of the bed playing "I´ve crossed oceans of wine to find you" while Michael Jackson is dancing in the room and singing along, and then Amy Lee secretly puts poison on her lips and kills me with a kiss."
Very realistic, huh? xD

At first I thought that the perfect death would be like this:
"I´m at a HIM concert, I´m in the front of the audience, I watch the whole concert, then Ville let´s me come up on the stage and sing a duet with him, and just when we have finished singing one of the speakers falls on my head, killing me fast."
But then I realized how traumatic that would have been for the band...

So I´ll go with the "kiss of death" :P

I had my eyes checked yesterday, and now I´ve picked out a pair of glasses, they´re really cool, kind of :).
And I got myself a new pair of shoes, just regular boring ones. But they were cheap, so I thought "Why not?"
Well, now I´m off to the store with my brother and my brother-in-law^^

See ya.

Heroine

When I´m feeling sad or depressed or whatever, I try not to talk to people about it, and I try to act normal. I feel weak when I show people my emotions when I´m feeling down, it makes me feel like a baby.
But I can´t seem to stop letting people know when I´m going through a hard time, even if I don´t show emotions and stuff, I always express how I´m feeling in some way. And it bothers me.
I´m not looking for pity or anything. I´m really not.
But I feel like I have to get all the words and thoughts out of my head, and writing them down is the only method that seems to help me, at least for a while.

I got out of bed at eight this morning, for some reason. And this day has, so far, been one of the most boring days of my life.
I´ve kinda noticed that most of the time, I´m bored. I am always, always bored.
And I need to do something about that, very soon, or I´ll burst.

Hello

Ok, so now I´ve got an english blog. I´ve been thinking about getting it for a while, and now it´s done. Because I´m really sick and tired of swedish. Swedish SUCKS.

So, my life is a total mess right now. And I still don´t know what´s going to happen to me, and where I´ll end up. But I guess I´ll just have to wait and see. Pfff.
These last few days have been very messy, dramatic and chaotic. This whole week will probably be the same. I´m sick of all the drama!
I want it to be over now so I can start living again, and get control over my life again. Right now, everything is just a fucking mess. I feel like I´m going to blow up at any second now.
Pfff, I´m sick of this...

But hey, at least I´ve got my music, and that´s all that matters to me.
Well, ofcourse I care about my family and stuff. But I could never, ever live a life without my music, even if I had my family. I would die without music. Seriously, I would.

But now I´m really tired, so I´m thinking about going to bed. I need some strength for tomorrow :P

Goodnight.